Spectrum Shrinker Gifts

"My super powers are listening and downsizing my life."

'...when did you first get these feelings of wanting to be a psychiatrist?'

Your energy bill is enclosed. You might want to sit down.

"Daddy, why do people pull round pizza from square boxes and cut them into triangles before they eat them?"

'F-E-E-D-T-H-E-D-O-G . . . Hey that's spooky! Why would your granddad say that?'

Three-dimensional, eh --- What makes you so spatial?

"Actually, the job calls for someone who is convex."

Essex computer.

Shrink

Full fatHalf fatVirtually fat free.

Sphere vs. sphere reimagined.

'OMG Roger, you look totally out of shape!'

The irony is that Euclid himself is way out of shape.

The irony is that Euclid himself is way out of shape.

Psychological Warfare Target Practice

Interior Un-Decorator: We Help You Downsize!

"Slow down. This stuff is gold, I’m tellin’ ya! Gold!"

Meanwhile, back at the 'shape' party... 'Hey, check out the square dancing with Brenda...!'

Evolution of the Mathematician.

A Wrecked-angle.

Christmas Group Therapy.

"Frankly, I've repressed my sexuality so long I've actually forgotten what my orientation is."

'I'm sorry, we can't give you a surgically inserted gastric band, as it appears you already have two!'

'My therapist says I've developed a cult of personality disorder.'

'Take comfort in the knowledge that better men than you have far worse inferiority complexes.'

The benefit of a joint geography and geometry degree.

"I am the change you all can be."

Institute of Solid Geometry and Institute of Plane Geometry

'You know sooner or later they'll notice you've replaced your monitor with a portable TV.'

"At this time of the summer, I hate time."

The Ekert Saga: 'Ok, girls...we need to get the Ekert back down to reasonable size before it destroys out house...so no more TV, radio, or any other negative energy...'

"OK, let's talk about your narcissistic tendencies."

Shortfuse psychology...making anger work for you!

I gain weight every fall and then lose it in the spring. I have a seasonally adjusted figure.

Cricketer hitting ball out of TV.