Spectacle Scholar Gifts

Oculist.

"I guess I'm more of a why-wolf."

Ghost School.

The spirit in the wall would go on and ond, but Alvin never let it bother him.

'Ugh, I hate food with preservatives.'

The Giamatti era

Eugene Ionesco

Dear Diary

Ted Roosevelt, conviction cartoonist.

Graduate

'Well, I guess a master's degree is a master's degree, even if it is in skateboarding.'

"Why always a book report? Why not ever a TV show report?"

'Now cover the other eye & read the same line.'

'And they say our brains were the size of a walnut.'

'After the wizard gave me the brain,of course, I felt like I should use it.'

"It's the ABCs, Justin. You don't need to fact check."

Magnifying glass on Oculist's sign.

Henry proudly models his new goggles that prevent him from losing a contact lens.

'Well, I guess a master's degree is a master's degree, even if it is in skateboarding.'

"She's so smart...on the highway of life, she's in the E-Z Pass lane."

Osteologist

"The moment you walked through that door, I could tell you needed glasses."

"Why do I think you need glasses, Mr. Jones? For one thing...the chart is over this way!"

"Last week I spent thousands replacing every window in our house...then I discovered a crack in my glasses..."

'Well, I guess a master's degree is a master's degree, even if it is in skateboarding.'

Morgue Waiting Room.

"And what can I do for you, young lady?"

Graduation Day At Telekinesis School

'It's the end of an aura!'

"Today we'll be discussing the Universal Law that explains why if you leave a basket of clean laundry in the same place long enough it will eventually look as if it belongs there."