Sparkle Loving Friend Pillows

Cut out and keep your own Cleaner.

"So, tell me a little bit more about this house training you mention on your CV."

Dog chews 'The Cat Book'.

"There's really not much to obedience school. Just listen up and do what they say."

Caveman's dog with head outside car window.

"We're just going to have to face the fact that you're not a puppy anymore!"

"And for lot 27 we have another old tennis ball."

"Oh, yeah, that's the spot... just stay there... hurt so good... a little harder—yes! You are my hero, no kidding, I freaking love y-oooh..."

Man has a picture of a rolls on his garage door...the car inside is very different.

Bears going water skiing.

A shop selling "Ice-cold Vodka" in 31 flavors.

'He rides in the car with his head out the window a lot.'

Canine Scentipede

'Half-baked beans, low fat variety' "Who says we have no taste?"

Beware of the Dog Hair.

Christmas Pets

I'm beginning to regret buying that Roomba.

Pet psychic -- yup, she's for real.

'She still won't accept that she's the cat, and not the meow.'

"Halloween is the perfect time to land on Earth. Nobody will notice us and we can get free candy."

"Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you were my dog Willie."

"Humans are strange."

"She's a dachshund-lemming mix."

"All you're doing is emboldening cats."

'You think it's easy, being married to a man who thinks of nothing but his work?'

'Now, you're new here, but you should know the rules: I get Master's newspaper and slippers! Got that?'

'Next!'

"...and yet it doesn't quite capture his thoughtful, contemplative side."

'Whatever surprise he's cooking up for you, I'm sure you've a good sense of humour!'

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Disco Bunny.

Chasebook

'I don't understand: I lick the plates clean, but Mistress still puts them in the dishwasher afterwards...'

'Surely they don't expect us to carry around THAT sort of money?'

Separation