Spaghetti Skeptic Gifts

'Do you call this spaghetti'

"No thanks, I've just had my suit cleaned."

"You ordered the organic, unprocessed, whole wheat spaghetti?"

"Please don't kill me."

'Do I have to give thanks for all the spinach, or just the bite I'm going to eat?'

'As far as we know, no one who has eaten our genetically-modified food has turned into a creature or anything.'

Spaghetti Road

Italian Style Fish 'n' Chips

"I like Casual Dining, but this is too casual. I ordered spaghetti!"

"It's natural, vegan organic, no additives, preservatives or cooking."

"No, we don't have field to plate provenance for each bean."

Guy Fieri

"Tonight's specials include beef wellington (long regarded as a major source of cholesterol and saturated fat), Cajun-style swordfish (suspected of containing PCBs and toxic metals), and chicken teriyaki (recent increase in the incidence of salmonella whi

'I'd like to be fed intravenously. I've heard about your hospital food!'

Grocery Store - Warning: Contents may be hazardous to your health

Spaghetto

'Romano, Romano, wherefore art thou Romano?'

"I want proof that I even need that much iron before I go eating all that spinach."

Spaghetti Mummy

"I'll get the onion soup... it's the only thing on the menu that I don't know why it's bad for me!"

"Sure, pal, whatever you say. Ha ha! The salmon is fresh."

'Your trouble is that you don't appreciate good food.'

"All right, let's admit genetically-modified foods will have an effect on people. It's fifty-fifty it'll be a good effect."

'This restaurant has got zero stars, right? Every single one of them is well deserved.'

The Humpback Whale . . . or as the Japanese call it, sushi.

"It's not fair that ice cream melts, but broccoli doesn't."

"It's got lettuce and pickle...why can't we call it a salad."

"Start Sucking!"

"When no one's looking, I'm cramming this entire ball of pasta in my mouth."

"...We don't trust any restaurant that has room for us."

'What! No garnish or side salad?'

"Aw, man, that's never coming out."