Spaghetti Sleuth Gifts

Revenge Food Porn

"To torture an insect or not to torture an insect, that is the question."

"And how is last week's tilapia tonight?"

"You ordered the organic, unprocessed, whole wheat spaghetti?"

The Huge-Underground Vat theory of why all wonton soup tastes exactly the same.

'Do you call this spaghetti'

Experts through the ages.

"How 'local' is the fish?"

"...I should have seen it coming...The busboys, the waiters, the dishwashers, the maitre d', all stealing shrimp, caviar, lobster, but ah, the strawberries, that's where I had them?"

'This is not Hungarian stew.' 'We ran out of Hungarians.'

"We know you boosted that milk truck!" "Admit it or we'll take a bite outta you!"

"If I don't think it's going to work, will it still work?"

'Edward de Vere? -- give me a break!'

Spaghetto

"I think they're beginning to suspect our science is fraudulent."

Tonight's Lecture: Contesting the Will. It's going to be about either inheritance law or who really wrote Shakespeare's plays.

"Hey Ed, take a look at this...more sleigh bells...what is this thing?"

Spaghetti Mummy

"Psychiatric emergency service? Please come fast, I have one here who believes in me!"

Mutant Mootunes - Incased in Ice Miss Marple

'Is there a doctor in the house we can trust?'

"Chef keeps the secrets of his sauces close to his chest"

'It appears that 'reduced fat' means high fat, 'lo-fat' means plenty of fat, and 'fat-free' means some fat.'

'There's a lamb chop in my soup.' - 'Oh, that's where it got to. It belongs to table six.'

Guess Where Your Dinner Is?

Waiter, there are tiny bubbles rising to the surface of my clam chowder. Conclusion" there's a flatulent fly in my soup. ? ?

'Oh dear. My husband looks suspicious.'

I don't trust that guy.

"I didn't want to waste the good stuff, so I used the oldest bottle in your wine collection for the spaghetti sauce."

"Aw, man, that's never coming out."

We never went to the moon. The Youtube evidence is conclusive. Not the Van Allen thing again." "Van Allen." It is absolutely impossible for human beings to traverse the Van Allen radiation belt. Explain how the Apollo astronauts passed through that radiation belt without either dying or hulking out. They were exposed to a cat-scan's worth of radiation. It was supposed to be a rhetorical question.

"Naughty? Nice? It's a bit more nuanced than that..."

'It looks fishy to me.'

'Of course, how else do you think we get off the ground? '

'Andy STILL hasn't got the hang of spaghetti..'