Space Jokesters Gifts

'Hey, this might work out after all -- this guy exhales carbon dioxide!'

"Please ask your pet to kindly put down the weapon."

"Good Lord! Life on Mars...adorable life on Mars!"

"The following program was made possible by fluctuations in the random chaos of the Universe...."

"The stars were much more beautiful from Earth."

"Not now, Oliver."

"The universe is expanding! Of course I'm expanding too!"

"Honestly, I didn't know your wife was in the shower."

God not-too-happy with the Humans sticking a 'Closing DOWN Sale!' sign on planet Earth

'...heard the one about the Venusian, the Martian and the Saturnian?'

Save Our Universe

Right, this is the map of all the UFO sightings. Hold the light steady love.

"And where do you see yourself in the next 7-8 billion years?"

"I've never read such utter nonsense! There's a guy here reckons we're all living in some kind of computer simulation!"

BLACK HOLES, the space path of least resistance.

'...it's some distance away - but there are lots of 'em and they're edible.'

Astronaut: Pay and Display Only

Cosmonaughty

Smokers smoking on the moon, Astronauts smoking on the moon

Escaping Black Hole - '..But captain that's the pensions black hole there is no escape!'

Mike had learnt by heart the whole training manual, apart from the most important bit.

"If small stars keep planets in line, what do big stars do?"

'Boy, that felt good! I can see why the devil has so much fun. And no, I'm not letting you in! But tell him I said hello.'

". . . And how long have you felt alienated?"

"Most of our procedures are out of network."

'If the Sun doesn't explode in five billion years, do you realize how foolish we'll look?'

"The Webb telescope can look FAR back in time to before things were a bit s**t!"

Black Hole Corks

'OK, who stuck that wedding confetti star on it?'