Spa Visits Gifts

Health spa workers desk tray: In / Chill out.

'Ethel? It's Kay! A couple of those cheap lights in the tanning bed burned out again.'

Massage therapist inadvertently beats up client.

"Another one so relaxed, she couldn't walk out of here."

'I've been wallowing in mud my whole life and look at me.'

'Mom sure goes to the doctor a lot. She's always going to get something called her mani cured.'

'You'll lose the first few pounds quickly - that will be your wallet getting lighter.'

Beauty Shop

Brow Threading

"If she's a write off can you let me know the scrap value?"

"Ok, so I'm a little late...no need to tear strips of me!"

'You don't know how lucky you are having tentacles instead of arms. I spend a fortune in manicure.'

'That's nothing - I once nibbled a toe that was THIS big...'

Odd Spas

'Nobody minds if I take the ocean view suite with complimentary champagne and Sven, the in-room Swedish masseur, do they?'

Mrs. Snowman talks: 'It took me a long time to get over my husband's death!'

"Apricot pit?! Are you kidding, Mister? This stuff knocks raw avocado and almond nut outta the water!!!"

Spa. The fitness trainer said I've been letting it hang out for too long to just tuck it back in.

Vinnie's Tanning Salon.

"Getting a Brazilian has been nothing like I expected."

Spa

Woman pouring perfume into her bath.

'More bubbles!'

Leave your troubles in the bubbles

Hot Pie Therapy

Steamed Room: "Man, I feel so much lighter."

'Wrinkles can't breathe in mud.'

Couples Massage: "Did you remember the body oil?"

Woman at spa having bath in a Martini cocktail glass.

Caveman has a good idea for the wheel.

What price beauty?

Hairy men taking advantage of the laser tag/laser hair removal combo package.

'You obviously took my suggestion to reduce stress to the extreme.'

A Manicure

'Tell me this - did you have this condition before you sat in the jacuzzi for 100 million years?'