Soup Soldier Gifts

"Sarge, this soup tastes watery."

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

Soup of the month.

"War is hell and so is this soup."

'I started out washing dishes, but when the dishwater tasted better than the soup...'

Jeff soon discovered his mistake in ordering the one ton soup.

"Your soup is delicious. The broth perfectly compliments the font."

Alphabet soup gets cold for slow readers.

"I've combined a laxative and alphabet soup. I call it 'Letter Rip!'"

'Excuse me, I ordered Matzo Ball soup.'

'Alphabet soup? What's alphabet?'

'Why is it taking so long to eat your soup?'

'Your fingers are in the soup?' - 'Of course they are. It's freezing in that kitchen.'

'Cock-a-doodle-doo!' 'Cut back on the chicken soup.'

The Huge-Underground Vat theory of why all wonton soup tastes exactly the same.

'It feels warm enough to me.'

Bottomless bowl of soup

"Wow, what are the chances of that four letter word being in your alphabet soup?"

'Waiter, there's a drone in my soup.'

Your friends pooled their retirements to buy you some super sex. I'll take the soup! Hey, I like soup.

'Actually, it's good, old fashioned, chicken soup.'

"Didn't I say you'd be the only man not wearing a bow tie?"

What's the insect de jour?

Soup Company: Chicken Stock, Beef Stock and Laughing Stock,

'I don't get it... Our business model was exactly the same.'

'Waiter, there's a cell phone in my soup.'

'Lovely soup, just like my mother used to open.'

'No, you can't complain to the waiter about the vegetables floating in your soup. It's vegetable soup!'

'To better prepare you for the future, I've replaced the letters in your alphabet soup with Chinese ones.'

'Exactly what day is this the soup of?'