Soup Detective Gifts

"Are those noodles?"

Soup of the month.

"War is hell and so is this soup."

'I started out washing dishes, but when the dishwater tasted better than the soup...'

"Your soup is delicious. The broth perfectly compliments the font."

Jeff soon discovered his mistake in ordering the one ton soup.

'Notice how with truth in packaging requirements all the labels begin with ‘OMG!''

'If he could trace the matching sock I've another 25 or 30 to account for.'

"I've combined a laxative and alphabet soup. I call it 'Letter Rip!'"

Alphabet soup gets cold for slow readers.

'Why is it taking so long to eat your soup?'

"It's been redacted to produce our sauces."

"Well, son. . . here your dad makes the famous 'fresh from nature' food!"

'Excuse me, I ordered Matzo Ball soup.'

'Alphabet soup? What's alphabet?'

'Cock-a-doodle-doo!' 'Cut back on the chicken soup.'

The Huge-Underground Vat theory of why all wonton soup tastes exactly the same.

'Your fingers are in the soup?' - 'Of course they are. It's freezing in that kitchen.'

'It feels warm enough to me.'

Bottomless bowl of soup

'Are you the guy who put gluten in the bread?'

"And that's where hot dogs come from."

"...I should have seen it coming...The busboys, the waiters, the dishwashers, the maitre d', all stealing shrimp, caviar, lobster, but ah, the strawberries, that's where I had them?"

'Actually, it's good, old fashioned, chicken soup.'

Soup Company: Chicken Stock, Beef Stock and Laughing Stock,

"Didn't I say you'd be the only man not wearing a bow tie?"

"Wow, what are the chances of that four letter word being in your alphabet soup?"

What's the insect de jour?

'Waiter, there's a drone in my soup.'

Your friends pooled their retirements to buy you some super sex. I'll take the soup! Hey, I like soup.

'I don't get it... Our business model was exactly the same.'