Solar Humorist Gifts

'They're actually street lamp-powered panels.'

'Houston, I'm prepared to land...'

"Something very big buried a lot of bones here."

"Once upon a midnight dreary / while I pondered weak and weary."

"Good Lord! Life on Mars...adorable life on Mars!"

"Abduction 101, when abducting eggs from a primitive planet always lower the temperature in the ship!"

C'mon, it'll be fun! I'll throw on some stars, pop in a few planets, drum up a life form or two, and this place will be hoppin'! The Big Shebang Theory.

'I don't remember predetermining THAT!'

God Sneezes Out Creation

"I'm just glad we got out before interest rates went up again."

'Before you can enter, you need to punch in the verification code so we can be certain that you're a real soul,'

'You've orbited the Earth in a NASA spacecraft! Wow! Me, I've jumped over the Moon...'

Clown God

'...heard the one about the Venusian, the Martian and the Saturnian?'

"If you get to the pitchfork-shaped cloud, you've gone too far."

'She barely made it out of the atmosphere... next!'

"The universe is expanding! Of course I'm expanding too!"

Man at penthouse party walks out onto terrace and is startled to see the Earth, instead of the moon, shining in the sky.

Alien uses astronaut's visor as TV to watch news.

Water is discovered on the moon....

'It's all done with computer animation now.'

"And where do you see yourself in the next 7-8 billion years?"

"I'm so sorry I let you talk me into letting you take your pet along on this trip!"

Hey, how was space? Fine. Jeez. The adolescent astronaut.

Black Hole Research Institute - Office only has IN tray - no OUT tray.

"Would you like to leave a message? He's on the throne"

The new green legislature requires methane mitigation.

"We've come all this way to destroy their planet only to find they're doing it themselves!!!"

'Those are the Divinity students.'

"Is there someone other than Trump I can speak to? I didn't come all this way to talk to an idiot!"

'Three zillion, five hundred trillion and sixty seven billion light years from Zog and now you tell me you've forgot to cancel the milk!'

'Don't be silly - the sun won't burn itself our for another 5 billion years. Bedsides, the Earth will have been smashed to smithereens by asteroids long before that.'

"Sorry to bother you again but I forgot to ask you to fill out our service evaluation questionnaire."

"Shall we put it in play?"

Mars Rover