Soda Seeker T-Shirts

'It says exact change only,'

"Hawaii, where are you folks going?"

Revenge of the Jelly Mother.

"We won!"

The prophet who changed water into diet grapefruit soda.

Shoe addict.

'And if you can't find the microbrew you're looking for here, you might want to try our other store: Microbrews C to E.'

The Alpha Seltzer

'How about joining us for a soda and pizza after the ceremony?'

"I want to leave myself some caloric margin of error for dessert."

"The best thing about this, is the lovely honeycomb centre."

Segregated Beach

'What kind of filling would you like?'

"Well, do you want to buy this sofa or not? You've been on it for three days!"

'No surf?'

'Do you mind if I take a straw?'

'If I promise to be good for the next 30 years, can I have some sweets Dad?'

'I found this bag of salad hidden in the locker room - who's is it?'

"Holy water, holy water...."

Evolution into a pair of sandals.

Another Victim of Beach Brain

The male of the species approaches the cafe counter. What's that, Mr. Pinkerton? Careful not to disturb those around him, the male scans his surroundings. His senses, his vision and his sense of smell have been honed by years of evolution and survival. Sniiif! At last, the male makes his move! He orders one slice of rhubarb pie, a la mode! You want pie? Suddenly, he is alerted to danger. The male seeks refuge behind a petunia! … but is it too late? No pie for him. The male will have a salad. The

Thirsty Couple Crawling Through Desert.

'Those are to increase my mental energy. . . Those are a mild sedative to calm my nerves.'

An astronaut finds a dehydrated man on the desert of the moon.

I've been ordering a diet coke here every day for the last year. Do you admit that? Um

'Buy a bottle of these vitamins. If you're strong enough to get the lid off, don't take them.'

Man passes Holistic Health Clinic and sees Holistic Donuts.

'Oh, yes! I can see it.'

No Loitering

"Yeah, my grandpa is a famous water diviner: he's discovered 63 wells to date..."

"This coin must be 2,000 years old. Try not to put this one in a pop machine."

"I hate this damn counter and, by the way, you stink."

"These drinks are fun even after you've finished them."

Energy Drinks