Hydration Seeker T-Shirts

"It's worse than salty - it tastes like detergent."

"Water, water? I heart you the first time, pal! Grocery department, Aisle 12."

"Today we'll be performing some much needed maintenance on Miss Trimbles weak pelvic floor."

'And if you can't find the microbrew you're looking for here, you might want to try our other store: Microbrews C to E.'

Institute of Health next to Alternative medicine dept

'Our health-care system - eat organically.'

Beer Order

"That's good. Now extend the fingers and lose the attitude."

"Slow down. I need another drink. Can we rest for a minute?"

"Their wedding registry has 8 place settings of double wall, stainless steel water bottles."

'Do you think I need to eat less. Do you have a book you could recommend to tell me how?'

"....And the weatherman said it was going to be a hot one today so take it easy and stay hydrated..."

'It's not my fault that I've developed habits that cannot be sustained.'

'Tough day at the office! Somebody broke the water cooler!'

"Now that you mention it, I have to admit, the daily grind IS starting to get to me!"

"Do you want fries with that?"

Nutritional Supplements.

"Here's to us, kid—and the healing powers of raw juices."

'Bottled water or other non-carbonated diet beverage!'

"Holy water, holy water...."

"There! Now let's hear no more noise about wanting a glass of water!"

Three cases of therapy-resistant low self-esteem

Cures for the void.

Make your own bottled water.

"Wheatgrass is highly effective at neutralizing joy."

'St John's wort ambulance' - hippy ambulance.

'Everything looks good, Now, we'll just bring in the company psychic to see if you have any pre-existing conditions from a previous life.'

'Ptuwah! This is tap water!'

'And also, no cigarettes, no cigars, no alcohol,no sweets,no dairy products, no bacon, no ham...'

"You're carrying a lot of tension in your neck."

'Do you have bottled spring water?'

"Yeah, Charlie wnet to one of those 'mindful outdoor experience' seminars. . ."

'It's a clear case of dehydration.'

An astronaut finds a dehydrated man on the desert of the moon.

"He went to an alternative therapy seminar to find ways of reducing his stress levels..."