Sod Seekers Gifts

Lawn & Garden Supply. Sod. They're arguing over the last piece of sod we have in stock. I hate these turf battles.

"Hawaii, where are you folks going?"

Revenge of the Jelly Mother.

'And if you can't find the microbrew you're looking for here, you might want to try our other store: Microbrews C to E.'

Shoe addict.

"I want to leave myself some caloric margin of error for dessert."

"The best thing about this, is the lovely honeycomb centre."

Segregated Beach

'What kind of filling would you like?'

'No surf?'

'I found this bag of salad hidden in the locker room - who's is it?'

'If I promise to be good for the next 30 years, can I have some sweets Dad?'

Evolution into a pair of sandals.

"New Year's resolutions are fine, but we should really focus on squad goals."

"Holy water, holy water...."

Another Victim of Beach Brain

'Those are to increase my mental energy. . . Those are a mild sedative to calm my nerves.'

An astronaut finds a dehydrated man on the desert of the moon.

Thirsty Couple Crawling Through Desert.

The male of the species approaches the cafe counter. What's that, Mr. Pinkerton? Careful not to disturb those around him, the male scans his surroundings. His senses, his vision and his sense of smell have been honed by years of evolution and survival. Sniiif! At last, the male makes his move! He orders one slice of rhubarb pie, a la mode! You want pie? Suddenly, he is alerted to danger. The male seeks refuge behind a petunia! … but is it too late? No pie for him. The male will have a salad. The

'Buy a bottle of these vitamins. If you're strong enough to get the lid off, don't take them.'

Man passes Holistic Health Clinic and sees Holistic Donuts.

'Oh, yes! I can see it.'

No Loitering

'The only problem with solar powered air conditioners is finding a long enough extension cord.'

'Today in Tactile Effusions Class we are going to pop the bubbles in this packing material.'

"Yeah, my grandpa is a famous water diviner: he's discovered 63 wells to date..."

'...The world of vitamins can be complex.'

"I'm starting a new diet today. Let's go out for ice cream to celebrate."

They migrate here each summer in search of water.

Look! An oasis! An Arab spring!

Black Forest Cake

Jack and Jill Find Vending Machine

"I'm worried about him - he's praying to Mrs. Butterworth."

"Psst... jelly doughnuts."