Socks Critic Pillows

Why Popes Can't Marry

'Do you think that's wise?'

"Consider yourself lucky that you only got a little shaken up in that dryer--socks get lost in that thing and aren't ever seen again.'

"C'mon, you can do this! Be the sock!"

'It doesn't take much to please him these days.'

"Since we installed the video surveillance system we're losing fewer socks."

'How many blummin' shades of black ARE there?'

'Oh no...I'm living the dream.'

Flight Socks.

They knew they were made for each other when their eyes met from across the room at the Same Socks Bar,

'My Master is easy to follow - He's wearing odd socks!'

"Do you know donuts have fewer calories than you? I guess that would explain your muffin top."

'SAME SOCKS BAR.'

How it started: How it's going

'These are my 'golfing socks'... there's a hole in one!'

Houston, we've just found those lost socks people talk about...

'You were hot in bed last night.' 'I know, I should have taken my socks off.'

"Can I substitute one of your socks for the baked potato?"

Where missing laundry socks go!

'You should have used contraceptives -- I'm afraid your lucky socks didn't work.'

Christmas Socks

'You have a very advanced case of athlete's foot.'

"I said more sex, Barry, more SEX!"

Female sock walks away from male sock, saying: 'Look, it's just a trial separation, OK?'

'Tonight the remains of Jimmy Hoffa have finally been discovered with what appears to be millions upon millions of unpaired socks.'

Missing Sock

WISDOM! WHILE IT LASTS!, 'Maybe the sign wasn't such a hot idea after all.'

'I don't like to complain, but I'm getting a little tired of crudités.'