Sock Enthusiast Pillows

Sockeye Salmon.

"Well, it was nice knowing you."

Sock Without Partners Sock Hop

"The bad news....we have to remove the leg. The good news...No more unused odd socks!"

"I'm afraid it's chronic. And in case you need a second opinion, I brought in Dr. Sock."

"Where have you been all these years?"

Punch, Judy and Socky

Crisis Counseling for Odd Socks.

Female sock walks away from male sock, saying: 'Look, it's just a trial separation, OK?'

'My wife thinks I'm stuck in the lint catcher.'

'Do you think that's wise?'

Wife needs husband's socks.

"Lost" socks are not accepted into society until after they have stolen a pair of your reading glasses.

'How many blummin' shades of black ARE there?'

'My name's Sammy the Sock Puppet.' - 'Hello, Sammy.' - 'I'm not happy about where your hand is.' - 'You're a sock puppet. What do you expect?' - 'Kill! Kill!' - 'Gah! Not the eyes!'

'You should have used contraceptives -- I'm afraid your lucky socks didn't work.'

Houston, we've just found those lost socks people talk about...

Dad has so many pairs of socks he wears them on hands, head etc.

"You've got holes in your socks. Shall I throw them away...?"

"Will you love each other until the washer and the dryer part you?"

Ankle Sock

Single socks? Looking to hook up with other single socks in your area?

Returning socks into the wild.

"Two weeks after our marriage it turned out that she is 50% polyester...the bitch! I'm allergic to polyester! Man, never marry a sock puppet..."

Missing Sock

'They're all the same. They love a tumble in the dryer, but as soon as it stops, you've lost a mate.'

'You have a very advanced case of athlete's foot.'

Sock dressing rooms

'I'm taking my socks to the launderette.'

'You're like a new pair of socks. You shrink from washing.'

'It's the latest trend! It saves you losing one sock in the washing machine.'

'We had to close the changing room. Too many people were just using it to put on puppet shows.'

"Since we installed the video surveillance system we're losing fewer socks."

"Why must you insist on making knee-high socks out of all my ankle socks?"

"C'mon, you can do this! Be the sock!"