Society Gossip Gifts

"Apparently that's his new little laptop."

News and Magazines. Celebrity gossip. Sports scandals. Political bickering. We're out of the "information age" and well into the "too much information age"!

"I'm voting for Stephen because I cannot stand Katie's mother, she is so catty! Anyway-- how're your parents doing with the divorce?"

"And now here's Cathie with the hypothetical portion of the news."

Annual run-off at the mouth.

'Yak, yak, yak.'

"I'm more of a 'How Jen stays thin' person than a 'Why Jen won't let Brad alone' person."

'What's wrong? Think the walls have ears?'

Men gossiping

"Pssst! I had some CGI done."

"...and she said 'MOO!'"

'It's a fake - but all the hanging around the water cooler is down 57%!'

"Can you recommend a wine that would compliment a divorce?"

'Georgy Porgy kiss 'n' tell story.'

Guess which "squeaky wheel" got another raise.

'No. . . I'll never spend £400 on a haircut. . .'

"I guess when your husband dies you'll really understand what they mean by a statistical death."

"If you have any gossip, tell me now - she could come back ay second."

"Did you hear that that bastard McMinney has buggered of to work for Bank of America!"

'John, I have to get going. Here's my views on politics, sports, and automobiles in case some of the boys come in later.'

'I'm a fat cat in a dog-eat-dog world.'

"The incessant chatter was driving me crackers, so I got him his own twitter account."

"You would be perfect if you weren't you!"

"Maps to stars' rehab centers."

"So, Tom from accounting—you remember Tom, right? Anyway, Tom yells 'TMI, Gail!' Can you believe he said that?" "Textbook Tom."

"Can you keep a secret?"

'Vanity, thy name is Maple.'

"Water cooler talk stations."

'Our new simplified energy bills just have a few options starting with 'Grossly inflated' and progressing to the premium 'Bloodsucker' package. . .'

'Botox...'

"Here they come: Detox and Botox."

“Rumor has it, it’s happy hour.”

"It was the unsubstantiated rumours that attracted me to you in the first place."

Weditorials

'Dear Miss Etiquette, I'm never sure if I should say anything...'