Social Scene Sage Gifts

Conversation-Killer Whale

"Don't even interact with him. He just likes to say 'Kalamazoo.'"

"Jackie, why does your relationship status read ‘capitulated to’ me?!"

"I imagined the Library of Congress would be much bigger."

"I know! Two years without anymore Game Of Thrones?"

"...But of course we'll still be friends on Facebook!"

Welcome Association of Stage Builders.

'I love shopping for clothing I don't need with money I don't have.'

Twitter censorship

"So have you ever stopped to ask yourself: If he really knew the secrets of the universe, would he be living in a damn cave?"

A book reviewer reads between the margins.

"How can anyone remember Cheech and not remember Chong?"

'It's not dead, honey. You've just never seen it turned off before.'

'Ere-we distinctly asked for SAM an' Ella!'

Daniel Day Lewis & George Glasgow

'We're looking for something that captures the zeitgeist of the nation...you know, the Great American Tweet.'

One can hardly be expected to solve the riddle of existence without a computer

Multiple personalities with blogs.

'This has a great ending...he shoots her.'

Computer spying.

"Is there a dramaturge in the house?"

'So, the memo said, 'twenty-one gnu salute' huh?'

'If you're going to stare at that thing all day, at least watch something educational,,, like Japan,'

"Do I look like a wise man to you?"

'I still have all my own teeth.'

"Just think, someday we'll be considered 'retro'."

"Oh, do stick it adjectively adverbially where the 'effin' sun don't shine!"

tbh 'tis better to have followed and been unfollowed than never to have followed at all lol #perspective.

"You're dated look is an absolute tour de force."

"Yes, you've mentioned this 'Facebook' in the past—tell me, is 'Facebook' saying anything right now?"

"The best advice I can give you is: 'Be Yourself.'"

"Rough year?" (2021 new year baby asking 2020 old year man)

Customers Wanted

'Did you spill my pint?'

Modern publishing.