Social Interactions Gifts

"Oh, I see you're busy, so I'll keep talking."

'Fred always makes a poor first impression ? he says it saves a lot of time.'

Nobody likes a detached retina.

'DO me a favor. Don't keep saying 'Hi. How's it going?' whenever you swim past me.'

'Mom, you didn't say please or thank you.'

'...Sars virus? - no, he just stinks.'

'I'd like to see you in my office, Brenda.'

"Typical! The Joneses are the first people in the close to get the flu."

A group of women concerned about a priest climbing a ladder

"I always end up next to the weirdo!"

'In my little case I have something her next door reckons you can never afford!'

"So there I was, alone in the restaurant, when this girl asked if I was single. I said 'yes' then she took away my extra chair."

"...You don't look a day over 50 million!"

'You're trying to find yourself? -- No offense, but if I were you, I'd look for somebody ELSE.'

'But you told me to bring a friend!'

"Maybe you need some kind of app to make it work."

"You have to get up early tomorrow, too? We have so much in common!"

"Every time he elbow bumps me, he hits my funny bone on purpose."

"That man who tells those corny long-winded jokes you pretend to laugh at is here."

"I can't approve of your office gossiping, Frank...and after you tell me the latest I want it to stop!"

Did you hear Sadie's show today? Of course not, little buddy. Randy's man-rule #68.1: "Never admit you know anything about what the people you know do for a living." It's the first page in the chapter titled: "Never Display More Interest In A Person Than That Person Shows In You." Do you know what I do for a living? I don't even know your name, little buddy.

Refusing to shake hands

"Community Board."

"Great coffee, Carole."

"Hi, there. I'm Dick. Are you seeing anyone?"

"I know it's our first date and we're at this fancy restaurant and all, but would it be a red flag if I ordered the chicken fingers?"

"You ain't wearin' a brassiere." "How could you tell?" "Cuz the wrinkles are all stretched out of yer face."

"Down low - Too slow!"

"Of COURSE I run into the cute guy the day I just rolled out of bed but didn't roll in something smelly yet."

"Call me!"

"I just had a great idea! Instead of having dinner with your mother tonight, let's not have dinner with your mother tonight!"

"She likes you."

"Don’t take it personally, Ed. Your wife told me I was a terrible kisser, too."

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