Social Interaction Escaper Gifts

Stimulus Hunger: 'Every now and then, Roger likes to cut himself off from all stimulus.'

Woman dreaming about being on vacation.

'I'm just going to go and slip into something more comfortable, like denial.'

"It's a beautiful day. I should go for a walk. . . Oh, now my neighbors are all out there."

'She got all the soap opera channels at a discount -- it's some kind of 'frequent cryer' program.'

'I've been thinking about quitting, but it's the only thing that gets me out of the house.'

"Who's my perfect little excuse to leave social functions? You are, yes you are."

'Where do you expect to see yourself in five lifetimes?'

"I'm looking for a data plan that will be constantly out of service so I can tell my dates I didn't mean to ghost them."

"There's no phones, social media, selfies, reality TV, online trolls, political-correctness or fake news."

"At last - no Trump."

Board meeting "And finally, gentlemen, Miss Silverman with the lunch-time scores."

Man opens front door to find he's up in clouds.

Houdini 2019

"Would it decrease my chances of getting a five star rating if I were to ask you about your political views."

Man entering shed with beer: ?OK Son ? tell your Mum I?ve gone on a mission to Mars and I could be some time! ?

"You know what you're running here, Lou? You're running a haven, that's what you're running here, Lou."

Kissing Hands

"He went that-a-way." (snail escapes).

"Log into nature"

'If you keep running away, son, you'll never make it through your formative years.'

Message in a bottle.

"And this brings to a conclusion, thank goodness, our broadcast day."

"Nothing for me, thanks."

Silent Body Language

"Do you have any video games that would help reduce my role as a father?"

'And you can no longer talk to people face to face!'

"Gotta go, guys. I've had about all the male bonding I can take for today."

Group therapy for the socially retarded.

"I have no problem with reality. It's just the occasional intrusion of gritty realism that I hate."

Liking the Exit.

Virtual Reality Check

'A lovely area, but not enough waiters!'

Black belts in the ancient art of avoidance

"Mom, I can't take the stress of social media. I'm running away from my home page!"