Snow-day Comedians Gifts

Song Parody on cold weather.

"All natural snow cones for sale."

'The bank says they're freezing my assets! I don't understand: They've always been frozen...'

'What do you like about winter? I like these crisp, cold morning walks in the glistening snow.' 'I like how you can keep your extra beer outside.'

Rude Snowpeople

'Kids like my presents, but do they really like me?'

'YOU are fed up with it . . . How do you think I feel?'

The Month of August

"Everytime you touch me, I get frostbite!"

'Good lord, Mrs. Frost, how long has he been running a fever?!'

Weather today.

'Be fair, George - how do you expect me to find your contact lens in this lot?'

Greco-polar wrestling

'I see a lot of that at this time of year...you've got a nasty case of cabin fever!'

"Normally, applying heat would be the correct therapy, however..."

"Asides from today's wind-chill factor, what else might you consider all your parents' fault?"

'Where is the global warming when you want it?'

My tail's cold.

"...heat escapes through your head. Lose the hat and you might make it through April"

Uninhabital USA.

"Didn't I say to just sprinkle salt on it!"

A snowman executes another, but not in the fashion originally planned.

"Nothing like a snow zombie."

"Put on a top hat and scarf. You'll freeze your carrot off!"

Hand emerges from King Arthur's xmas pudding with a coin.

A snowman missing his base begs for change.

'Find yellow snow? I invented it.'

Who's laughing at my antiperspirant now?

Deep Snow All Around

'Cold today, isn't it?' - 'Yes, I actually saw a solicitor with his hands in his own pockets.'

'And do we really need scarves for warmth? And what's with the stove top hats?!'

Snowman asks boy: 'Mind if I come in too? It's freezing out here.'

'I think maybe they should move opening day until it's warmer.'

Melting snowman roasting marshmallow on open fire.

"CCCOOOLD!"