Snout Period Comedy Gifts

'Personally, I don't question these things. My snout period will simply end when it ends.'

"He's having a hard time finding work."

Little dog in Romance section in bookstore under sign: 'Puppy Love'

"Little help?"

Dog Wrestling.

"I never saw 'Cheers,' so I won't miss 'Cheers.'"

Snowman Driver

"Well, hello there yourself!"

'How 'bout you come back and say that to me in he spring?'

'He wants to return some shade trees because they stopped working in November.'

When Pugs dream.

"Your tests look normal, but that's what the disease wants us to think."

'He'll need some blood thinner immediately, but go grab me a sandwich first.'

'Dad, the baby has swallowed your nails.'

The Itchy Back

"Look at you, all gnarly and naked and gross!"

"I see Linda and Gay moved back from down South. I knew that wouldn't last."

'Bless you.'

How to Tell Spring is Here.

' . . . and a surplus screw for the heck of it!'

Don't worry Sir, being colour-blind is not much of a problem around here...

Gesundheit! - a christmas tree should be fresh.

Ahh, Spring! A time of growth, a time of green, a time for birdies to be seen. A time for hope across the land, a time for hankies close at hand! Aah! CHOO!

"I want to cancel my 3 o'clock and my 4 o'clock, and oh! I want to cancel my 1:30!"

'See you next spring, Morty.'

"Well look who decided to show up."

"Do those shoes taste funny to you?"

'Was Rudolph's nose an early prototype of a GPS?'

"I see a very BRIGHT future for you."

"In your condition, all I have is a job at the stripped club."

'I'm looking forward to Spring: I'm sick and tired of hay, I want fresh grass!'

First Snow of the Season. . . 57th Snow of the Season

'Don't tell anybody, but it's 100% styrofoam!'

"Been working out?"

'You don't need to feed the meeter. It's Christmas Eve.'