Sneaky Viewers Gifts

Children watching a horse show from under the tent

"Don't make me resort to alternative questioning techniques."

"Quit chasing carbs, try a protein bar."

Chocolate never tasted as good as when I sneak a piece while dieting.

Cookie Thief

"My boss says I'm very good at what I do."

'...How much did he pay you to sneak in here and take his fitness test?'

'There you are - you know you're not supposed to be eating that!'

'Well, he gave me treats, patted me, played with me: How was I supposed to know he was a burglar?'

"Dad, this is not the one that was here earlier. He left at half past eleven."

Hunting wildfowl

Your husband will kill you!

Power theft on mobile phones

'Put the cheesecake and cappuccino on one bill and the health salad on another bill so I can show my wife that I'm watching my diet.'

'I really enjoyed that, but if anyone ask, don't you dare tell them we watched it.'

Dave figured out if he added green food coloring to his milkshakes everyone just presumed he was drinking a kale smoothie.

Servant girl making an excuse to go out and see a soldier

"Ooh, I need a drink. I wish I didn't have to hide it...but I don't want the family making fun of me. Mmm...that hits the spot."

Mexican taking a siesta. Telescope coming out of top of his Sombrero,

'He won't be easy to catch. He's well rested - slept through the sermon.'

Checking the closet.

The incapacity benefits people want you to give them a ring...'

"I'll take a salad, add bacon bits, extra cheese, dressing, and powdered sugar, not lettuce."

"I've hidden all the emergency chocolate in the fruit bowl, it'll be quite safe there."

Spying on the football

!There you are - you know you're not supposed to be eating that!"

Midnight Snack

'If you're going to draw on the wall... do it behind the sofa.'

'Me? I'm waiting for my parents to leave so I can watch something I'm supposed to watch with parental supervision.'

Flirting woman taking money from a man's pocket.

A hunter who has snuck off with a picnic basket.