Sneaky Slider Gifts

An outstanding high school pole vaulter, Kevin was never caught coming home late,

'The secret to doing a book report is only picking books that have been made in to movies.'

"well done rescuing my son. Now, your final task is to quietly transfer the baby to the cradle upstairs, without waking him."

McMorkim's Cheeses Security A gang of mice wheeling in a giant mousetrap with Pizza and Beer as bait to a Security Guard's post hoping to gain access to a cheese Factory if the Guard is trapped.

Rusty, not believing in God, seized his chance...

"I'm just going to ring the doorbell so I have a chance of a spot in the bed."

A cat is hiding in a block of cheese to lure a mouse out of its hole.

'My hot-shot assistant was named as one of the top 10 to watch."

"To lose weight they said I've just had to give up two things. . .food and drink!"

"Can I have another free biscuit for my dog?" "Sure." "Can you warm this one up? Maybe sprinkle some cinnamon and sugar on it, and maybe make it three biscuits?" "You sure this is for your dog?" "Can you also sprinkle a little turkey on it?"

'You'll want Mr. Pigglesworth's version of the story too, I assume?'

Children watching a horse show from under the tent

"Quit chasing carbs, try a protein bar."

"Don't make me resort to alternative questioning techniques."

'This time, put it someplace where we can find it.'

In Disguise.

'Never underestimate my ability to slink'

"My boss says I'm very good at what I do."

Furtive Milking

Chocolate never tasted as good as when I sneak a piece while dieting.

Cookie Thief

'It's the simple things.'

"This is just between you and me and the lamppost." "I'll sell it to the tabloids."

"I don't think he can touch your in-the-dirt ball."

'...How much did he pay you to sneak in here and take his fitness test?'

"No. I can still see you."

'By the time they realize what's up bear season will be over.'

Man planning on standing on a turntable to aid hammer throw.

'There you are - you know you're not supposed to be eating that!'

Undercover Agent

Street trader tricking police.

'Heads up, Carl! Pinch runner!'

Man at sports arena sees plane pulling banner that tells him to get back to work.

"I told the missus I'd be pottering around the garden all weekend."

a drink at the pub