Sneakiness Connoisseur Gifts

"Dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, onion bagel with Nutella and cream cheese, dirt, dirt, dirt..."

The Philip Marlow family

'This is a personal insult to me and my family. Paulie, word is you regifted that horse's head I gave you last month. . .'

'I think I can solve our budget problem with the color scanner, color laser printer and this twenty-dollar bill!'

"Listen, that's a Tang Dynasty urn we just broke."

"With me everything is 'scratch and sniff'."

Crime Writer's Society.

Children watching a horse show from under the tent

"First of all, this conversation never happened."

"My boss says I'm very good at what I do."

"This is just between you and me and the lamppost." "I'll sell it to the tabloids."

"It's too good. I think it's going to be a forgery, not just a copy."

"Before I begin, everyone must sign a non-disclosure agreement."

Man stabbed in crime section of library, writing 'AAGH!' on piece of paper.

'Well, he gave me treats, patted me, played with me: How was I supposed to know he was a burglar?'

"This cheap wine doesn't have a cork to smell, but the label is scratch and sniff."

Frivolous Fraud Squad

Tweet from this retreat . . you are toast

A burglar pretends to be a shop mannequin.

Your husband will kill you!

Hunting wildfowl

"One day all this will be yours."

Servant girl making an excuse to go out and see a soldier

You have the right to remain silent

"Does this count as photo I.D.?"

Clancy:Shirt for Every Day

"Careful, Rocky. You're about to give away the secret behind your knockout punches."

"Ooh, I need a drink. I wish I didn't have to hide it...but I don't want the family making fun of me. Mmm...that hits the spot."

Mexican taking a siesta. Telescope coming out of top of his Sombrero,

"You'll see it when it's done."

Fly mugger mugging with fly swatter.

"Sir, your change."