Sneaky Chef Gifts

reasonably healthy vegan chocolate mousse

"Remember, don't ever let the surveillance camera catch you killing a cockroach."

'The secret to doing a book report is only picking books that have been made in to movies.'

Halloween may be a little different this year.

McMorkim's Cheeses Security A gang of mice wheeling in a giant mousetrap with Pizza and Beer as bait to a Security Guard's post hoping to gain access to a cheese Factory if the Guard is trapped.

"well done rescuing my son. Now, your final task is to quietly transfer the baby to the cradle upstairs, without waking him."

Rusty, not believing in God, seized his chance...

'Does this thing get channel four.'

'My hot-shot assistant was named as one of the top 10 to watch."

A cat is hiding in a block of cheese to lure a mouse out of its hole.

"Mrs. Simpson would like the recipe for your 'delicious steak pie', dear. Do you think you could dig the packet out of the recycling tub?"

"Can I have another free biscuit for my dog?" "Sure." "Can you warm this one up? Maybe sprinkle some cinnamon and sugar on it, and maybe make it three biscuits?" "You sure this is for your dog?" "Can you also sprinkle a little turkey on it?"

"More helium."

'You'll want Mr. Pigglesworth's version of the story too, I assume?'

"Don't make me resort to alternative questioning techniques."

"Quit chasing carbs, try a protein bar."

'This time, put it someplace where we can find it.'

In Disguise.

Cookie Thief

"My boss says I'm very good at what I do."

Furtive Milking

"Do you like eye of newt in your Mac 'n' Cheese?"

"I don't think he can touch your in-the-dirt ball."

Chocolate never tasted as good as when I sneak a piece while dieting.

'It's the simple things.'

Witches in kitchen, sign for man says 'Your dinner's in the coven'.

'There you are - you know you're not supposed to be eating that!'

Street trader tricking police.

Undercover Agent

'By the time they realize what's up bear season will be over.'

Old man stealing sand from a sand box for child

"No. I can still see you."

'Chefs, the secret ingredient for tonight's competition is - wing of bat!'

'Heads up, Carl! Pinch runner!'

"I told the missus I'd be pottering around the garden all weekend."