Snack Sneaker Gifts

"Wait, this seems way too easy!"

'Shhh. . . even in his sleep he can hear cookies crunching.

'Headmaster I'd like to report Biggins and Small who were caught this morning consuming trans-fats behind the bicycle shed.'

"That's the door to the gym, past all the snack machines."

'The following program is intended for beer bellied, sports crazed, couch potatoes!'

Secretive Weigh In.

'I just love this work from his macaroni period,'

'When the doctor told you to warm up before exercising, I don't think he meant with hot chocolate and hot cross buns.'

"To lose weight they said I've just had to give up two things. . .food and drink!"

"I was going to share my cookies with teddy, but he's on a diet....so I had to eat them all."

"Do you want fries with that?"

'We live in a designer trainer.'

"So which one of you pesky dogs stole the last cookie from the bottom of the jar?"

'It must be love if your sneakers melted!'

'... And for $50 more, this is the same basketball shoe in a turbo model.'

You shouldn't sell any chemical lawn products, dad! I only carry a few for the bottom line. You peddle poison for profits? The new sneakers you want aren't cheap, kiddo. Then I won't get the shoes. Ok, ok. I'll consider getting rid of the chemicals. Who knew reducing my carbon footprint meant going without shoes.

'Snack Bar's Open.'

'Bad news. Your arm is too injured to hold up those sneakers you endorse on TV.'

"I decided to go on land after I got the sneaker deal."

Authentic Hot Dogs.

"Wanna swap lunch? My wife packed me birch again..."

'Top of the line sport shoes: They've improved my top speed by 0.5 kmh...'

"No you don't young man....Those shoes cost me 4125.000, there's no way you're wearing them outdoors!"

"Most men have a tankard, but oh no, not you."

"If you're as smart a refrigerator as they say you are, you'll keep your mouth shut about this."

Can I help you? I need some sneakers. Sale. Okay. We've got ones for running, jogging, walking, basketball, tennis, pickleball, hiking, cross-training, golf, bowling, volleyball, squash, badminton, jumproping, racquetball, skateboarding, climbing. What activity best describes your needs? What do you think, Ernie? Was "ottomanning" a choice?

Patent Office. A credit card chip embedded in sneakers? How would you make a purchase? Swipe your feet!

"Of course, ladies and gentlemen, the optimum endorsement would be from the Crips and the Bloods."

Boot Wishes it was Trainer.

'You can't expect everything you need to just come falling from the sky'

'Would our taxes be any cheaper if we lived in a sketcher?'

"My chips need more salsa."

'This is quite common. You've eaten so many sausages that you've turned into one.'

"I'm sorry, sir. No outside food is allowed in the theater."

'Well, I'd say this calls for a toast!'