Snack Sage Pillows

'In this aisle I'm a real fortune teller - I 'NO' all.'

The wonderful world of cheese.

Chez Nous Menu

Bad for you but to die for

What do you mean you prefer the sound of the sign of the right?! What part of 'either way we're dead' do you not understand?

Little league world series of poker.

"Tia Carmen, is it okay if my study group meets here tomorrow?"

"Don't tell me... you hired a professional decorator!"

"This was a wicked-hard test. I'm pretty sure everybody got a bad grade."

To do before Saturday...

You're next, Mr. Kimble - right after his apple danish.

'Seven layers in one dip? Gentlemen, what have we wrought?'

"I used to be a vegetarian. Then I became a vegan. Then a fruitarian. Now I only eat manna that falls from Heaven."

Man opens refrigerator which promptly burps.

Jeff's Smorgasbord

"To lose weight they said I've just had to give up two things. . .food and drink!"

"I have to admit. You talked a good game."

"Quick swig first?"

Champagne

"Sir, I have a question that's lunch-related."

"The most obvious side-effect of having a chip implanted in my brain is a constant craving for onion dip."

'I'm saving some for leftovers tomorrow.'

'The doctor said my body is 40% fat. These cookies are only 20% fat. That's got to help.'

"I told you to order the mild salsa!"

Randolph maintains a stiff upper lip while the rest of him just goes to hell.

Saguaro Cacti.

"Ralph - you'd play better golf if you had your eyes checked."

"We know you have better treats than raisins...we hacked your supermarket loyalty card."

Budget Munchies

"Yeah. I'm into fitness. Fittin' dis whole sammich in my mouth."

'Can we move the beef jerky a smidge and display our organic cleanser?'

'Snack Bar's Open.'

"Guac-A-Mole"

'She's on the rotation diet. Every time I turn around she's eating something.'

Authentic Hot Dogs.