Smoking Sage Pillows

'I'm not up here seeking wisdom - this is the only place they'll let me smoke.'

"I'm here for my 10,000 cigarette check up!"

"... and I have a follow-up question regarding rawhide."

Learn Guitar In 6 Easy Lessons: Add another fifty difficult ones!

"You said mindfulness could help us do well on the test, so I filled it up with as much as I could last night."

Fumes from furniture

One can hardly be expected to solve the riddle of existence without a computer

Saguaro Cacti.

"I always say; 'You don't need to spend a lot of money to have a good time on a first date."

"Do I look like a wise man to you?"

'Stop gritting your teeth!'

"Rough year?" (2021 new year baby asking 2020 old year man)

"You know how I feel about sampling!"

The past only looks good when you're living in the present.

"E-cigarette or non e-cigarette section."

'Wh-h-hatz-u-upp, dude?'

"I see you dropping something and then returning to me very soon."

'Was this eye of newt locally sourced?'

"There is some evidence that chocolate can be good for you... But the health benefits tend to fade after the first 20 kilos."

'About that blood pressure...stop taking things with a grain of salt.'

'There goes Mr. Negativity.'

"No wonder it's not done. You've got it set on grow."

The Deli Lama - Sandwich shop.

"You tell him it needs more salt, I'm not telling him!"

'You're new at this, aren't you?'

'Hey newbie. Just ease and squeeze, ease and squeeze!'

"I don't think you'll still be that 'Zen' when I tell you someone's nicked your cheese and pickle sandwich from the fridge."

'I just love the change of seasons.'

'Hey, I just noticed something. So you know what you get if you cover the 'c' in potato chips? Potato hips, isn't that funny?'

"Of all the lazy, lowdown, deadbeat, pathetic losers you've ever met who had the most influence on you?"

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single status update."

A look into the future?!

'That mantra you gave me is politically incorrect!'