Snack Planner Pillows

"I asked folks to bring whatever they want, so now we have ten tubs of guacamole, no chips, and eight cases of the most obnoxiously flavored hard seltzer."

"Damn it, PB&J again."

'My diet's good...I'm two weeks ahead of schedule.'

'Still not ready to talk? Ok dip him again.'

'I love our hideaway. I only wish we could find it.'

Chez Nous Menu

'Like death by salad.'

"Tia Carmen, is it okay if my study group meets here tomorrow?"

Little league world series of poker.

To do before Saturday...

"Any of you guys feel like hot dogs?"

Barbecued dessert, anyone? The coals are PERFECT now!

"Isn't it great to get out of the kitchen and cook in the fresh air!"

"This was a wicked-hard test. I'm pretty sure everybody got a bad grade."

"Mom, does the Russian borscht you made for dinner give me foreign-policy experience?"

Fishing for complements

Kiddies Menu for Witches

'Men order. . . women shop.'

'Eight wiener dogs, and six rolls. It's just not right.'

You're next, Mr. Kimble - right after his apple danish.

'Seven layers in one dip? Gentlemen, what have we wrought?'

"Ok, ok, we'll travel back to dinnertime one more time, but then it's my turn to choose."

Jeff's Smorgasbord

Man opens refrigerator which promptly burps.

Prosecco Peacock

"I'm very health conscious. I only eat animals that are vegetarians"

"I hope you're not using any of the canned food I so diligently stockpiled.

Champagne

Remarkably Richmond

'Mustard, ketchup and mayo are all nice and creamy smooth. Why isn't anything being done about relish?'

Shopper in grocery store sees TV dinners marked daytime and prime time.

"I'm sorry, I didn't pack it, but I'm guessing you can find a stick."

'I'll pour yours out as well Dear - I know that you won't be long.'

"Sir, I have a question that's lunch-related."