Smoke Break Comedian Gifts

'Me too. Just outside for a smoke...!'

"I think I see a miscreant in the carpark. There's no time to call the police I must deal with it myself."

'I'm on my break, Sam... I'll call you back when I start work.'

"The project must be failing! The manager just suggested I take all the credit for it!"

'Mr Evans, I think we'd better reconsider our no-smoking policy.'

'Since he stopped smoking, he doesn't know what to do with his mouth.'

'Are salary increases automaric, or do I have to work for them?'

'If you want to smoke, you'll have to go outside.'

'Forget about going to the store for a bicycle patch. I used one of your nicotine patches.'

'Well the dog's been passively smoking our fags for the past ten years, so I think it's only fair that he has a nicotene patch too.'

"It's my in-tray!"

Grumpy man telling a teddy bear whoes watching TV to get out of his chair

Punch has a smoking break.

"It's Ok, I'm not working!!"

'It's a nicotine patch: I'm trying to quit smoking...'

'Aren't we entitled to a ten minute smoking break?'

'By this time next year you'll be with someone new. You'll tell her about today and laugh. You'll laugh that snorty little piggy laugh of yours. She'll throw you out too.'

Smoking and non-smoking sides of a Volcano.

"Are you sure this is the only place we can smoke?"

Are you a Questionnaire Addict?

"Jumping?! Don't be stupid, this is the only place where we're allowed to smoke!"

'Oh, quit griping and be glad they even have a smoking section.'

"This is our company's smoking area..."

'Ronnie has never stopped at amber.'

'Is this the smoking area?'

'Run out of paper cups again?'

'It's the only place I'm able to smoke !'

"You certainly keep the smoking section well away from the non-smoking"

Smoke Screen

'It's dreadful being out of work - I just hand around all day, drinking tea and smoking. . .'

Smoking outside the Pearly Gates.

The control group is non-smoking!

Security Guard Catches Smoker

'Smoking causes cancer in humans. I'm canine.'

'I'm going out for a smoke...I could be some time.'