Smell Sensitive Gifts

'I don't need to exercise to lose weight. The odor in this locker room suppressed all my appetite.'

'Fight air pollution. Help me raise enough money to leave the state.'

"Eww - that whale's breath smells awful!" "You could use a breath mint yourself, lady!"

'Have you tried out new Labrador Retriever Butt Scent?'

A consumer guide to cheese.

Dog fetching slippers with a peg on his nose.

I'm beginning to regret the hearing aids.

Barristers wearing clothes pegs to overcome a bad smell

LOVENUTS: 'We were irresistibly attracted to each other's smells,' says Jo-Jo.

'Do you like my new fragrance - It's called 'Surrender'.'

"Jordan takes his wife's wind chimes – he shoots!"

"No offense."

"Yeah, it's completely irrational, but the smell of freshly baked bread makes me salivate too..."

'To cure your dog I suggest you change your aftershave lotion, Mr Lutshbuddle.'

Skunk in library reads from the '10 Best Smellers'.

'Garlic or non-garlic?'

Skunk to psychologist: 'It doesn't do me any good to stop and smell the roses.'

"Whore of Babylon?"

'I'm not happy with my 'honey and lilac' shampoo.'

An advertisement in an apartment window reads 'Drum Kit For Sale' - the sign in the neighbours window reads 'Thank God!'.

"Don't mind Bill. He's got misophonia."

'Luck I forgot my deodorant this morning.'

PERFUMES, 'It's really just a sales gimmick, but we make everybody sign a waiver.'

"You know that summer's arrived when you can hear four different radio stations from your own lawn."

'Now, this one gets about a hundred males to the gallon.'

"It gave me time to think, and I've decided to ask Estella if she wants to hang out! All I need is a great opening line!"

'He likes your aftershave lotion.'

Island Breeze Scented Air Fresheners.

'This is sensational, Madam...in fact, it comes with a complimentary pepper spray!'

'I stand here before you with a heavy heart. There is a growing wheat intolerance in our land, and that makes my stomach turn...But get this! They say that's what we're doing to them!'

"Everytime we go over there, Aunt Irene hugs me and I smell like a girl for an hour!"

Stinky fish

The Clouds of Repellent

"This shampoo is ruining all the great smells I rolled in on my walk!"

Jobs that will make you really lonely...