Scent Sensation Gifts

Estate Agent Aftershave.

I'm at the shrub with the empty bag of pretzels we sniffed last week. Where are you?

'Have you no common scents?!'

"I'm getting cinnamon, brandy, nutmeg, a hint of Alsatian."

Aromatherapy for Men

"Do you smell something?"

'No, that's not my shaving lotion. We've been burning cow chips in the wood stove.'

'He'll love this cologne. It has the scent of an undervalued stock.'

'It's for the girl who's in a hurry.'

"And not only do I make my own pizza sauce, I have a special way of crushing the tomatoes!"

"Do you prefer lavender scent or strawberry?"

'You see?! These cones may keep us from licking ourselves, but they really enhance our sense of smell.'

Amy Winehouse

"It's less of a spell than it is a signature scent."

'(Sniff!)... Hey! Somebody stole my identity!'

Why used clothing should be declared a dangerous weapon...

"What pheromone are you using?"

Barristers wearing clothes pegs to overcome a bad smell

"I ask you, how can something so cute and soft smell like a bag of Fritos?"

You're right. It's not fear I smell but angst with a hint of regret.

"Well done, yes, it's a skunk scent. Concentrate though, can you smell the faint trace of perfume? It's a female skunk..."

Again, that's yours.

'I don't need to exercise to lose weight. The odor in this locker room suppressed all my appetite.'

'To cure your dog I suggest you change your aftershave lotion, Mr Lutshbuddle.'

'It's easy to follow the No Deodorant Kid.'

'Do you like my new fragrance - It's called 'Surrender'.'

This cologne reminds my husband of our first kiss, years ago in the old copy room. It's eau de mimeograph.

"Scratch and sniff ... it smells like mimeograph paper."

'Don't pay any attention to him . . . his social networking relies on his sense of smell.'

"Your perfume is driving me crazy. It smells like truffles."

'Garlic or non-garlic?'

Oh, sorry, I just love that new car owner smell.

"Penny, what is that scent you have on? I must know." "Don't you just love it, Lucy? It's dead rat."

"Absolutely perfect! How did you know?"

'Those plug in air-fresheners seem to do the trick.'