Small Town Visits T-Shirts

Welcome to a Sleepy Little Town - name available on request.

Glass and Porcelain Store: Elephants must remain outside.

1989 Map Of Sorghum Corners, Ohio

ONE HORSE TOWN

Wyatt returns home to visit his old small town.

Welcome to Yellow Pages, Vermont

Mistaken identity.

Centerville.

Business man with places he's visited on his suitcase and places he's worked for on his chair.

You are not here.

"Local shopping, local eating, and...I married the girl next door."

"I couldn't find parking in the city, so I moved home, got back with my high-school girlfriend, had a baby, and got a great deal on a new car."

It was so quiet in town the residents took to taking chairs to the corner so they could watch the traffic lights change.

Hadleyville Has-Beens

Welcome to Springdale...'We're number 10, 11, or maybe 12!'

Exit 66 Yaphank: If you have already been to Yaphank please disregard this exit.

road sign: "Gilkers Corners Population 926

"It's where I grew up, Diane. A sleepy little town where everybody knows what everybody else is doing, and blogs about it 24/7!"

Staycation holidays...

Model Shop

'Country Village. Population: 1246 (weekends), 27(Mon-Fri).'

Smalltown, U.S.A.

Pond Village Store Generalists

Just as sinister, creepy and full of dark secrets as the towns on those TV shows, but without all the 'Look at us, look at us, Aren't we special?' Nonsense.

Another sleepy one town horse.

Welcome signs 'Newtown Falls...republican 8,democrat 2, None of your damn buisness 194.

"You ain't from around here, are you, Mister?"

"Welcome to Cornish Est. 1763. Nothing to see here, move along, folks."

Entering Yoke.

West Fester needs to get with it! Sorry, Twig. We like it dull. Tuba concert. We want quiet, steady citizens. Isn't that discrimination? Only against exciting folks. We welcome boring persons of all races, creeds and sexual orientations. Wow! A rainbow of monotony.

Just in from St. Paul.

'Me? I'm from a one horse town. . . It was incredibly lonely.'

"Believe me, the street smarts you picked up in Elmwood, Kansas don't carry any weight around here."

'Shee-yoot. Now we ain't even a one-horse town.'

Small Town USA.