Slothful Savant Pillows

"He tried living in the fast lane, but he didn't like it, so now he just sleeps all day."

"Tariffs love me...tariffs love me not..."

Plant Lady

'Dang! I never now if the sommelier is messing with me.'

"All dishes marked with an asterisk are served with sarcasm. . ."

Homo Zapiens

Angel wears t-shirt with logo: YOLO.

East End Maps.

How the goat got square eyes.

Book on Thumb Twiddling

Lazy man contemplates the moment of creation.

"I don't think there's anything wrong with your fitness watch: It's just that you haven't moved enough to trigger it..."

'Boy, there are days I feel like doing even less than I usually do...'

"Remember, son, you can be anything you want to be...except for maybe an aroma therapist."

Bummer Time Streaming

"The lost password department's that way."

'Late night with Norm Klosterman'

"I hope you don't mind, I've just scribbled a few different ideas!"

'Hey! You forgot the TV!'

"I'd really let myself go. I hadn't shaved in days."

'Seem the remote?'

'Welcome to 'Wall Street Speaks'... and now our next guest is an expert on street talk.'

"Some cactuses get all the arms."

"I never wanted this to be a long-distance relationship."

"This straw sucks! 'Er not."

Grumpy Moody Boy.

Thank You For Not Calling Me Dude!

Sloth Machine

"I think this department may have something to do with your company's productivity problems."

Desert Island Slob.