Sloth Embracers T-Shirts

'Don't look at me. I'm not the one who puts the measuring cups where I can't reach them.'

'I blame global warming!'

Tired Barbie

Ultra-lazy sloth

After many years of wavering Dennis finally makes the decision to step out of his comfort zone.

Jackson Pollock makes a mistake: 'Guess I'll have to start over.'

"But Herman, we can't just throw in the towel like that."

Anxiety of Change

'He's doing it again.'

'I have way too much respect and dignity to dye the grey out of my hair... so instead could you all just put on these brown-tinted glasses.'

Fortune teller predicts a bigger family for worried parents.

'Of course things change: our fathers were replaced by machines - we'll be replaced with new software.'

Man rummaging through a TV set throwing out bits of paper

"Teacher believes in performance-enhancing hugs."

Salman Rushdie

"That explains why Larry is the most confident employee in our company!"

"Over here, Phyllis. I've moved to the center."

'They sometimes mistake him for a statue.'

'Hurray! I'm a baby!'

'Congratulations, your days of avoiding the real world are finally over.'

"You're over reacting. Everyone gets a gray hair."

'I don't have a problem with you spending $1,500 on golf clubs, so you shouldn't complain about my spending $100,000 on a sports car.'

'I'm putting you on a forced exercise program of walking. Hand over your driver's license!'

Organised Crime / Disorganised Crime

"You look amazing for someone who's just woken up!"

'Peace'

'I'll buy them if you let me carry them out in a size '5' box?'

"Make it sassy, Jim."

"Does my bump look big in this"

Turning my life around.

'If I had to live my life over again...I'd make the same mistakes sooner.'

"Okay, you're right! It's impossible to repack sardines!"