Slope Rookie Gifts

'First of all, relax.'

'I love your playing....especially when you stop!'

Man pushing Euro sign up a hill.

'I love the mountains and all, but I simply can't do this....I'm just too chicken.'

'I'll clobber the first joker who ask me if I enjoyed my 'Winter Break'!'

'Should I try a three point turn?' - 'Better not, we only have 30 minutes left.'

'I said, 'Left after the bunny slope! Left!'.'

Watch out For Falling Skiers.

'Good! And now - by simply shifting your weight - begin to carve a wide, slow turn across the slope.'

'. . .So that's two brandies, one Gin and Tonic and two rums!'

Skiers rolling down slope in snow

Skiing Accidents.

Algebra Research Center: Come In We're Slopin'

"I'm not going to hammer it in. You hammer it in."

Winter Roadwork...

'They've got $5 tables everywhere here. Where do you feel the luckiest?'

'I never know whether I should get good gloves that I'll lose after three runs, or cheap gloves that'll fall apart after five runs.'

'Just a few more lessons on the training skis, and you'll be ready for a solo run, Mrs. Trimble.'

And now bring the girls!

Border Guard

'You sure you've done this before?'

"Let me tell you Belinda. . . you certainly don't belong on the beginner's slope."

'Yup, I think mine are broke too.'

'I always thought 'bunny slope' was just an expression.'

Hitchhiking skier

Ski Slope

Colorado skier

Skier with an anchor.

Ski slopes with intimidating names.

Ski Toilets

injured skier says medicinal brandy is bad

'Which side would you like me to drive on today?'

"I am snowploughing!"

'Wow! They said security would be tight.'

Learning to Ski.