Slice Savant T-Shirts

'It's commendable that you only ate one slice of pizza, but when you're only cutting it in half...'

Plant Lady

Peter's Pitas - now with pickled peppers.

"Statins. I got statins. Who needs statins?"

"Forget the allowance - I need a benefactor!"

"Finally a perfume store my husband will enjoy visiting."

"I use old Duke to check my steaks. If it feels like Duke's tongue, it's rare, if it feels like his ear, it's medium. . ."

'Who cares what she thinks? Grow a pair and buy the damn thing.'

'Mustard, ketchup and mayo are all nice and creamy smooth. Why isn't anything being done about relish?'

"So we've managed to consolidate all our multinational 24 hour hotline support centres down to one Single Point of Contact... and here he is."

"Ah — excellent catsup."

TV Producers Workshop. The first goal of a series to avoid cancellation long enough to issue a DVD set. Get boxed before you get canned!

Sandwich snob.

'I tell you what: Thank goodness for tomato sauce...'

'Just bring a few hundred sausages, plenty of wine and of course your barbeque.'

"We kiss a lot of frogs so that you find your prince."

Computer grabs man and tells him to stop it.

Two lemons enjoying some reading time together in their 'Home Sour Home'.

'I'm sorry, I can't reveal my sauce.'

'You're in trouble. Your confidential memo went toxic and so did that tuna salad.'

I'd like it sliced thin for sandwiches.

"Now let's walk through slide 67...'50 ways to make your presentation more exciting'."

'Just a minute, I forgot something.'

"Chef keeps the secrets of his sauces close to his chest"

Department of Redundancy Department - 'Hot Dog' Frank Wiener, Director

"And I recommend to not get sauced."

"What would make it perfect, egg salad or pastrami?"

"Set phazers to medium rare!"

"I see that there's an excellent sale on diddly-squat at the Zilchtown Mall in Nowheresville, New Jersey."

"Okay. Two Buffalo Burgers comin' right up"

"It's not a first edition, but it's from Moses' workshop."

Cattle barons for world domination.

'Ketchup? You know that's an insult to the chef, right?'

"Any word back from the TED conference?"

"Murder, eh? They nabbed me for bargain-hunting without a license."