Sleep-deprived Champ Pillows

"I know what you're thinking: 'Did he get six hours of sleep or only five?'"

'I never get a good night's sleep. Thank God for these office meetings!'

"Sorry Tina, I won't be able to come over: Joey is finally asleep and I don't dare move..."

Tired Barbie

'You've got the Vietnam 1000 yard stare. All new parents get it!'

"And remember, it's important to wake them up at hourly intervals."

"Alan had to work all night on his presentation....this is what 17 espressos does to him."

"Call him Koffee- he keeps us awake!"

"I'll give you 15 minutes, no biting."

Women pay for one hour of uninterrupted sleep.

"So much for 'sleeping like a baby.'"

The Uncle Vinnie Insomnia Open

"Puffiness and dark circles under the eyes, sniffles, trouble sleeping, rashes...you don't have allergies...you have children."

Tired - Stressed - Tired.

'What he lacks in intelligence he makes up for in stupidity.'

You're supposed to read him a bedtime story at HIS bedtime.

"Today is my second birthday and I wanted to let you know that I intend to take full advantage of my terrible twos!"

'What makes you think that he doesn't want you?'

There Are Two Rules to Baby Club......

What are you doing up, mom? Big meeting tomorrow. Must be prepared. It's one a.m.! Go to bed, young lady. You need your sleep. It must be late. I heard my voice coming out of your mouth. Scary!

"Mommy is taking the nap that you refused to take."

"Yecch! How can something so sweet put out something so yucky?"

"Did he sleep through the night again?"

Crying parent holds crying baby.

'There are four reasons for him to cry...he's hungry, he's wet, a pin is sticking him, or he wants to wake you up from a sound sleep.'

"I'll get you a drink of water, but next time, call Dad, not room service."

"Having fun there little guy?"

"What time should we wake him for breakfast?"

"Oops! Sorry! Clocks forward, clocks back, immigration,migration. . . I never know whether I'm coming or going!"

A sleeping man counting scuba-diving sheep

"Oooglie oooglie googlie googlie..." "Who is this person? Where's the one with the milk?"

'Your 'power nap' is somewhat undermined by Mr Cuddles.'

Rings beneath your eyes mean that you have children.

Rings Beneath Parent's Eyes.

New parents shocked at having slept through the night.