Ski Resort Worker Gifts

Watch out For Falling Skiers.

Happy Hour

Bathing-men attend to women on the french coast

'You brought my slippers?... What kind of rescue dog are you?!'

S.P.F. 1,000

'GESUNDHEIT!!'

'I'm detoxing - do you have any mineral water?'

"That's the Bronco Whisperer. He'll have that wild stallion broken in a day or two."

Zenboni

"Well - aren't you going to ask me if I'm over eighteen?"

"Is there anybody there?"

We were out of little umbrellas, so I added a bit of sunscreen!

"Humans are crazy! Like life is not hard enough in winter, they have to make artificial snow!"

'Now that's what I call a rescue dog.'

"Hells Angels, Zamboni Division"

Man crawls out of avalanche to see two rescue dogs relaxing.

"C'mere, kitty. Come over here, kitty. Good kitty. Nice kitty cat. Get over here, you @#*% furball."

"No brandy? Just a gift card?"

"You haven't left much room for sun tan lotion"

'He's not hurt. He's just really, really cold.'

The stilt walkers union on strike

"How did you reach me? This isn't even a phone."

Helicopter Rescues.

"I'm not going to hammer it in. You hammer it in."

St Bernard dog rescues a snowman.

"I see this place is very popular with tourist industry workers."

Punch has a smoking break.

"Forget skiing - he's been doing the mens' downhill since I married him."

"Of course she looks good. I hear she's had styrofoam injections."

"I wish you would quit referring to this establishment as a sweatshop!"

Dunk Hunt

'You're new here, aren't you.'

'How did things go down at the glacier today, dear?'

'I believe St. Bernards Monastery is now a 5-star hotel!'

'Hello, is that the Moutain Rescue...? I am lost and disorientated.'