Ski Humorist Gifts

'Once you've got this mastered, Ellen, then you can try it on two.'

"Whoa. How deep is that powder?" "You'll have to ask my wife. I'm standing on her shoulders."

The rocket powered skiier

"Your tires are spinning and you're stuck."

Ski Slope Rated Black Due To Wall At The Bottom

Rude Snowpeople

I made snow angels in my good clothes and mom gave me the devil for it!

'There, that should freak 'em out.'

'It's easy, just wee!'

Oh yeah! It does echo when you moo very loudly!

"I'll admit I've packed on a few extra pounds, but it's only water weight."

'I bought winter tyres and it didn't snow.'

"Aw, geez. My nuts are frozen." "T-T-Tell me about it."

A diuretic! Are you sure about this?

"Please, God, help me get up, that's all I ask... I'll go right to church..."

"I told you we came back too early...I'm freezing my tail feathers off!"

"Still getting those hot flashes, Margaret?"

'Another botched Snotox injection...'

Two Men Who Wouldn't Get Off the Ski Lift.

Skier leaves his skis behind.

'Van Helsing, I've told you that just Holy Water isn't enough to kill count Snowcula! You need HOT Holy Water!'

It's a bit derivative.

Emergency Room: 'Quick! Get some ice on this injury.'

'Okay, but for future reference; We never grit the ice in here.'

"This is a stick-up."

"Didn't I say to just sprinkle salt on it!"

Melted But Not Forgotten

"Um...you have a little 'hare' in your nose."

Church Parking Sign for Midnight Mass

T-Rex Ski Jump Fail

I think it's a food allergy.

Whoa, you've been working out.

The Itchy Back

'You shouldn't have forgotten the flag!'

Snow man thinking, 'Brrr. It's even cold for a snowman today.'