Skeptical Saint Gifts

'Well of course I believed, but I never really thought it was true.'

"You have to believe what you're doing will lead to something valuable, even though it probably won't."

"Let's face it. The only play you've ever liked is 'Stop the World - I Want to Get Off.'"

"Imagine if only 1/2 the companies that claimed to have a great culture actually did."

"We offer a generous flex time policy - you can work your 90 hours per week any way you'd like."

A political promise is intended to be a golden egg...Which is kept in a pork barrel and after an election...Hatches into a dead duck before...it turns invisible so it can quietly vanish.

Punk Reindeer

Conspiracy Theory Bookstore: JFK, Princess Di, and Osama Bin Laden.

Community church - the home of religion lite - Sermon: 'Atheism? You may be right!'

Flat-earthers and round-earthers reach a compromise.

Scientific Research: 'Uh...why'd it take'em 20 yeahs t' figyah that out?'

"Right. Women adore him, men want to be like him, and YOU... well, you're hopeless. So, am I the ONLY one who sees through this guy?"

"Let's try to think of something that untold millions of people will buy."

"It's creepy thinking that Santa can sneak into my house undetected. I must find out how he does it!"

"Why do I hate religion? Imagine if half the money ever donated to religion had instead been used for scientific research. That's the world religion stole from me! Instead of worrying about the coronavirus, I could be slaying orcs on a starship's holodeck!"

'No, I don't believe in life after birth. When you're born, you're born!'

"If we can put a man on the moon, why can't we admit that the moon landing was a big conspiracy?"

Maybe I'd better write a thank you letter for the Last Supper after all

"Whoa! Now I remember. This was one of the possible side effects on the label."

'No, it doesn't have to snow for Santa to get here. He probably drives a big four-wheel-drive SUV ... '

Cemetery with graves engraved 'traditional medicine' and 'alternative medicine'.

Swami Trevor's Brotherhood of Celestial Enlightenment

The conspiracy behind conspiracy theories.

"If it takes the GMC 20 years to spot a rogue surgeon what chance have you got in 20 minutes?"

"The sky isn't really falling -- I'm just trying to make a living."

"Nihilistic rage motivates me to cling desperately to this job."

"I like the Easter Bunny - I find him less judgmental than Santa Claus."

'If this isn't a placebo you gave me, how come it says 'M&M' on it?'

I believe their products are rubbish.

'I don't really believe in Santa Claus anymore, but I don't want to disillusion my parents.'

'What's going on here? What you see is what I get, and what I see is what you get.'

"Before I give you my answer I just gotta be sure you ain't one of them nasty olee-garks I've been hearing about."

'I asked you for one good reason why I should follow your advice, not six.'