Skeletal Pun Lover Pillows

'The good news is that you're no longer running a fever.'

At home with the Bones...one skeleton yells at the dog chewing his leg, 'now cut that out!'

"Why am I always the designated driver?!"

'I'm looking fo someone who can make me laugh.'

'What is that? Is that sarcasm?'

"... And don't come back until you're ready to get funny."

'Well, isn't this nice? Three generations all sitting down together.'

Grim Reaper Snack Bar

'Took calcium supplements for years without paying for them.'

'Turns out medicine is the best medicine.'

Apocalliptical

'Let me handle this. I'm an orthopedic specialist.'

"Every time you lick your teeth, you taste your skeleton."

"Our forensic scientist quit, so our computer guy has stepped in for now."

Pizza Delivery Delays

'Maybe I should change this thing more often...'

"Here we still are, eh? So much for the gloom-and-doom types who warned us against eating all the vegetation."

'I collect a different type of oil painting.'

'Heretofore unnoticed resemblance between G. Washington and A. Lincoln'

"There's no point trying to complain, everyone is on a 'customer care' course."

Spring Cleaning

"Oh no, it's the Grim Streaker."

"Wise?! You believe you're wise!!"

Persian

Ted never got used to hitchhikers on November 2nd, the Day of the Dead.

'A pint of beer and a mop please, barman !'

"I'm sorry—the agency told me they'd cleared away last summer's people."

"Were the x-rays really necessary?"

"Our meaty ancestors didn't stand a chance once bears tasted their sweet, sweet haunch."

"Some Rain Forest this is..."

'It's dead in here tonight.'

Skeleton Portrait Painting

Jake played with a dead man's hand

"You really like this place, don't you, Harry?"

'Give me a beer, luv. . . Yeah, a mop.'