Singles Pillows

Hey guys, whatcha doin'? Where ya goin'? Can I come? Invention of the third wheel.

Woman seeks male companion...

'You asked her to go out with you?', 'Yes, but she says there's a lengthy approval process.'

Life is for the birds.

"Maybe the next one will be a singles cruise."

The secret of living happily ever after....Do it alone.

"It's the sequel to 'Cooking for One'."

"All the good ones are either married, gay or Viggo Mortensen."

Still searching for my Prince Charming.

"Alone bad. Boyfriend good!"

"Life is too short! Why should I waste my time frantically searching for a mate when I can create art instead..."

A man reads a book called 'Opening Lines' while a woman reads a book called 'Brush Offs'.

No boyfriend, can't be bothered t-shirt

"Don't wait too long for Mr. Right or you'll end up with Mr. What's left!"

"Teri tells me you're ostensibly straight.."

"If at first you don't succeed, buy me another drink."

"Honey who needs a man when you've got... Rhythm!"

"Do you know what girls want?"

'On the contrary, soap operas are a great time-saver -- you don't have to get married and have your OWN problems.'

Table for two. Whom does sir think he's kidding? You're right table for one. Menu.

When did this date go down the toilet? I assumed when you went to the men's room that you dropped it there.

'Yeah, but this time she just said no -- there wasn't any hysterical laughter!'

"At this point, I think a rich lightweight would be fine."

Wedding - throw the bouquet and the little black book.

'Are you seeing anybody?'

'You only love me because you haven't got a boyfriend!'

"Being a refrigerator magnet is fine, but I wish, for just one day, I could be a chick magnet."

'She won't even look at me. It's like I'm a banner ad.'

'I'm thinking the bee beard is the main reson that you're still single'

'We fed your application in, and the computer started leaking slime.'

Brenda second-guesses her decision to date a wi-fi hotspot.

Eric knew where all the real slappers hang out.

I really miss being in a committed relationship, Randy. Which part do you miss most? Having someone disagree with you over what you're going to eat, or over what tv shows you're going to watch? Or do you miss having to account for how you spend your time? Or having to explain why you bought yourself something awesome without first getting permission? Mostly I miss the back rubs. They don't ask you to wash the dishes first at massage parlors.

"I think you two may hit it off. Craig, here, is an attractive male academic in his early forties who seeks a warm, vivacious woman delighting in conversation, arts, and nature for an evolving romantic commitment, possibly marriage, while you, Vivian, are a good-looking, intelligent, stimulating woman in her late thirties who seeks an educated, unattached, well-bred man concerned with ideas, culture, and the environment with whom to share your life interests and companionship."

'Complements of the big smelly gentleman.'