Single Woman Gifts

I knitted him for you..

'If you can't get a doctor, dear, at least try to marry a quack.'

Life is for the birds.

"Maybe the next one will be a singles cruise."

"It's the sequel to 'Cooking for One'."

Just married and Just Single and Happy.

'I'm lost, did you happen to see a lady without a boy like me ?'

"Can I multi-task? As a single mom I'm both the bread-winner and bread-baker!"

"Yes, I'm alone."

"Alone bad. Boyfriend good!"

Still searching for my Prince Charming.

"You lack spontaniety."

"Life is too short! Why should I waste my time frantically searching for a mate when I can create art instead..."

'Don't look now - it's a ghost from our Christmas party past.'

No boyfriend, can't be bothered t-shirt

"Sure, I'd get married again, but who wants a she-wolf with two adopted children?"

"I'm surprised I'm still single - I always thought I'd be divorced by now."

Biological Cuckoo clock

"At this point, I think a rich lightweight would be fine."

"Don't make eye contact. Don't make eye contact. Don't...."

"Do you know what girls want?"

'If cupid shot me with his arrow this week, it would bounce right off!'

"I had guys chase my tail, then one day I thought, hey, dummy, get rid of the middlemen and chase your own tail!"

'On the contrary, soap operas are a great time-saver -- you don't have to get married and have your OWN problems.'

"Honey who needs a man when you've got... Rhythm!"

Wedding - throw the bouquet and the little black book.

'Hand me the 'desperates'.'

Mom's Diner - Thanks for not talking about your father.

Children.

"'Single'? With this kind of income? Oh, have I got a dependant for you!"

People told me virtual dating was safe!

"Being a refrigerator magnet is fine, but I wish, for just one day, I could be a chick magnet."

'Are you seeing anybody?'

"I suppose every girl dreams of someday getting a big divorce settlement."

They all have one thing in common...they all have bad breath.