Simplistic Play Advocate Gifts

"It only goes forwards and backwards. So, you won't need a GPS."

I rather like bucket and spade holidays.

'What's play?'

"Look what I found. Can we keep him?" "Wow! A real pirate!!" "Go ask your mother."

It was getting worse. Bob's power suit kept wanting more and more, whereas Bob just wanted out.

"Can Johnny come out and eat?"

'How's the water skiing?'

'Stop purring I can't hear your heart beat.'

"I need a simple fix. No one asked you to reinvent the wheel."

"It's a simple model but it works for me!"

"What do you mean, it's not an educational toy? I'd have to learn to ride it!"

'I'm being punished. Nothing even remotely electronic for two weeks.'

"I don't care if it does have wifi. . . it's a vegetable peeler!"

'Well, it's official. The entire catalogue has to be dumbed down again!'

Boy makes a finger shadow on the tent.

'You gonna sign for this, kid?'

"This dog has wheels!"

'Look Mum: I'm Platypus in Boots!'

'Take two jelly beans and call me in the morning.'

"We're pretty sure it was the dissolving stitches."

Managing Targets: "It mat be simple but it works for me."

'Forget it, Jeb. This see-saw is broken.'

"We are not buying a refrigerator with a learning curve."

Children playing hopscotch wrong.

"I see you decluttered."

Stats. Fantasy League. The difference between men and boys is men draft their imaginary friends onto fantasy sports teams.

'And best of all - no hidden clauses!'

"I'm keeping it really simple!"

"I'm through playing doctor. With insurance forms, co-payments, and malpractice suits, it's just no fun!"

'I thought I told you not to play 'foreclosure eviction' with your sister's doll house!'

The First Sign Your Child May Be A Superhero.

'No thanks. This patch stops me craving for superflous functions.'

'A grass box for the children is a wonderful idea.'

'I didn't use a plate because my soldiers are underequipped.'

'Hey, you two! Stop that.'