Silly Ponderer Gifts

Did you know that hawks can travel 250 miles without flapping? Big deal. So can I.

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

'Things have really livened up down there since You introduced SEXUAL reproduction.'

The Philosopher Pine, or, The Eternal Optimist.

"Have you been playing dice?"

"Intelligent design...well, duh!"

'Oh, so now the ocean isn't GOOD enough for you?'

Sauce for the Goose

Freudian Bar & Grill...Jungian Pub: 'We can out drink those Freudians ant day of the week!...'And twice on Sunday!' ...'Yeah!' ... e

"When we're home, are we still aliens?"

"Mrs. Marsha Mullhouse, of Kenosha, Wisconsin, asks, "Are You subject to the laws of physics, or are the laws of physics subject to You?"

I don't think I'm letting sunlight in when I open the curtains. I think the darkness is going out.

'Half an optimist is an odd bird, Sarah.'

"No, I don't want to live forever, but I damn sure don't want to be dead forever, either."

'Gosh, I dunno. You sure it's organic?'

"I guess now's as good a time as any."

'I hate to tell you this, but enlightenment just isn't for commuters.'

'Look at it another way. Happiness can't buy you money!'

Afraid of change - leave it here.

The probability of an event occurring is inversely proportional to its desirability.

"It all started when I read somewhere that happiness is an inside job. Naturally, I assumed some breaking and entering was involved."

'...and that is my philosophy.'

'Why am I the one always getting kicked?'

"A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single malt."

"And the meaning of life is.... oh rats, the battery died."

"Now, my brave little soldier, do you have everything...an apple for your teacher, your satchel, pencils and books - your existential misery??"

'If you're omnipresent, why do I always have to climb way up here?'

I know time is an earthly construct, but I still feel sleepy in the afternoons.

Ivan Turgenev

I think my work ethic needs some work. Not to mention some ethics.

Le Penseur (D' Apres Rodin)

If a dog barks in the forest, and no one hears him, does he make a sound?

"I think it's wrong to hunt them when they're in a house of worship."

"Ok, so I go back and forth… Then what?"

CCTV in church.