Silk Tie Collector Pillows

'And once again it's ended in a tie.'

The Missing Sock Returns

'This is the only part of my old Army uniform that still fits.'

"But don't let my wacky tie fool you. We actually take business very seriously around here."

Special offer on snakeskin ties.

"Honey! Where are my lucky Incredible Hulk board meeting socks?!?"

Cat Tie

"1-1"

Out of kilter.

'You must be awfully secure in your masculinity.'

'Here was proof that Lawrence was indeed an Englishman."

'Who cares what she thinks? Grow a pair and buy the damn thing.'

'The latest market research shows that men's neckware width is the most accurate indicator of market fluctuations.'

"I'm a stay-at-work dad."

"Didn't I say you'd be the only man not wearing a bow tie?"

"You realize one of us is not coming back."

A man trying to decide which tie he should put on.

'He got a hole in one today.'

"It's bedtime, Roger. Loosen your tie."

Operation Father's Day

Has socks and foot stools of every kind sale.

'Fortunately I'm a big guy.'

Shepherds washed their socks by night.

Shaquille O'Neal donates his old socks to boy scouts.

'At least we don't have to worry about getting those as gifts.'

"Ever since I said I liked creative ties, things have gotten out of hand around here."

Enrico from Lucia di Lammermoor

Nice tie, Al - hand it over."

'He's a sniffer dog-trained to sniff out dope.'

Robin Day.

Retail store: 'put this on and shut up!'

'Herbie dear, why can't you ever forget the office?!'

"Whose tie?"

"I said more sex, Barry, more SEX!"

Bad Outfit Alarm.