Signal Geek Gifts

"Try S instead of L."

"He can't decide which one he likes best. . .His leaf blower, his weed wacker, or his metal detector."

Old navy veteran 3rd base coach

Elfie Stick

'...then Johannes Gutenberg built the first bookcase'

"There appears to be a flaw in our cloaking technology."

"'Original' to 'Carbon-Paper': Do you copy?"

Twitter censorship

Evolving Changes in Medical Lingo

'If I wasn't meant to destroy the world, God wouldn't have created me with atomic blasters instead of hands.'

Birds on a wire, "Bernie?...Oh he's gone cable!"

"In the spirit of co-operation, peace and friendship with the people of Earth, we welcome Captain Zork and his incredible advanced weapons technology..."

"Keep heart Rexy boy... even if we strike out, we'll look damn good doing it."

F&E Diner. I'll bet you want the alphabet soup, right? Hey! Don't put words in my mouth!

'Okay I admit it - we probably do need a rocket scientist.'

"I am using my GPS, but I spilled coffee on it which is why I'm really lost."

"Okay, who's been messing with the copy machine?"

Eden. Hi, I'm version 2.0.

'I told you to keep your rice in a plastic bag.'

Actually, could you just e-mail me your electronic signature? Meet the author.

Thomas Edison's brother Wilmer...couldn't even figure out how to turn on the light.

Caveman Wheel Invention Version 2.0

"If God had intended us to fly in jets, He would have seen to it that the Wright Brothers invented jets."

Workplace Confidentiality.

"So how exactly am I supposed to give a self-driving car a ticket?"

'Sorry, Professor Kleinzweck -- your 'Chaos Theory' program just crashed.'

Mars Rover

Traffic Offence Selfie

How wire-tapping began. Is that some kind of eavesdropping equipment? Sort of

'I think I caught one of those fish showing on the graph.'

No Carrot Sign (like the old 'no radio' signs).

"The new technology means we can watch our shares fall on four different continents."

'Hey Josh! This is the Grim Reaper calling. No really! I'm using all the new technologies now and, so sad, your minutes on earth - well, they're up!'

"I said, ‘I hit on your sister!’"

'Oh, this is just great... Now how am I going to get a Wi-Fi connection?'