Siege Warfare Humorist Gifts

"They have been given one minute to get out of town."

Cat in a tank...

Burmese pythons discussing a complete invasion.

Castle, Cafe + Gift Shop.

"No, you dismantle your nuclear arsenal first."

After defeating terror, George and his friends declare war on mild irritation and clouds.

Royal Bear Force - "Honey at 10 o'clock."

'Does my bum look big in this?'

'...and this is the Mess.'

"Did you call for a Medic?"

French Army knife

'At last! Some decent kit.'

'It's been five years since leaving Iraq and I'm still getting the sand out my ears.'

'Well done troops: Spring is over, we can have a break now...'

Banting in the Yeomanry

At a Country House

General's Coin Toss

'THINGMY ON THE PORT BOW!! You know, what's it called? Long and pointy... Very fast... TORPEDO ON THE PORT BOW!!'

US Camouflage School

'President George P. D. Q. ?3 Bush today called for Gulf War VIII'....'

My army drill instructors license plate is HUP-2-3-4.

"The bomb destroys only all life but not object! This means that our troops can have fun plundering and pillaging. War doesn't have to be inhuman, right?"

The Emperor of Irony

"Whoever made fun of my hat better step forward now, or I'll turn this march around!"

The Bengal Lancers/Bingo Lancers/Bagel Lancers/Bungle Lancers

Technical specifications: semi-automatic 1.2 mm cartoon launcher. 7.5 inch barrels holds a full stick of graphite. Fires rounds of sarcasm, satire and spoofs. Takes out religious fanatics with sharp wit.

Golf war: 'Fore!'

Beware of the dog.

'I know you didn't just reach through the torpedo tube and grab those fish.'

"It's from Private Ryan...Wish you were here."

The origin of 'Rorke's drift' has long been a subject of intense speculation.

'My doc says I carry a lot of hostility with me.'

"What do you think the delivery time is on a drone pizza?"

"It's a smaller, less destructive nuclear weapon, but it's also a hat."

'I don't know what I ordered, but I think it's going to be good!'