Sick Leave Gifts

"It's a 'Get well or else!' card from your boss."

"We had a coolection for you at the office boss.. and.. er.."

"Use your fingers."

'Wow: The new man who's filling in for you is the best worker I've EVER seen...'

Taking work to a colleague in hospital.

'It's a 'don't get well' card from the temp who now has your job at the office.'

"I won't be in today. I've decided to live off the land."

Get Well Soon and Hurry Back to the Office. . . Before Sharks Eat Your Job

"According to your brain scan, you just don't want to go back to work."

"Here's the deal, throw me back and I won't text your boss telling him you called in sick to fish."

"If I've timed this right, symptoms should start at exactly 9 a.m. Monday."

"I don't feel like going to school. Isn't that a flu-like symptom?"

'Another sick note from your employer !'

"He's never had a day off work through illness. He always stretches it to a week!"

'Can't come in to work today. I'm in bed with a nasty bug.'

'I discovered just as much work gets done when you're not there.'

"You better take Teddy's temperature too....he was awfully sick this morning!"

'Have you heard of the Phrase,'Survival of the fittest'?' 'Uh-ho!'

"I don't think I'm going to be in today, I got a bit wrecked at the weekend."

"Fever, chills and dizziness. Sounds like you have a Math test at work today."

'If you have a toothache, take the day off, you would be useless at work anyway...'

"I've lost my voice. Is it contagious?"

"Oh, no! Your boss enclosed your severance check in his get-well card!"

'Has there ever been such a sickly group of rugged individualists.'

"I forgot to call in dead."

'I'm still pretty unwell, I'm not sure if I'll be in the office tomorrow.'

'I'm sorry, Mr. Harris is not here. In fact nobody's here. I think it's a staff infection!'

'I couldn't decide what to wear to work so I just didn't go.'

I can't come in today. I haven't got chronic diarrhoea!

Woman watches TV wrapped up in warm clothing.

'Your absence is as expendable as your appendix, Merryweather!'

'No, you don't have fever. You have to go to school.'

'Take ten days off work.'

"Walt won't be at work today - he's flipped on his back!"

'Mr. Breeding won't be in today - so you people at the office have fun.'